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Can I just tell you? This whole site needs an overhaul. My goodness! Thank you for visiting, come back again in a few weeks. I still appreciate your support. :)
 
I love your support. So many of you have encouraged me to keep writing all these years. I took a few years off because I wasn't feeling very confident about my skill and self-conscience about my subject matter. I really appreciate your gentle (sometimes haunting) push to get back on the proverbial horse. My favorite thing in the world is making someone laugh, typically at my own expense. It warms my heart to hear that my silly stories have helped you smile or laugh out loud when you felt like that's the last thing you could do.

 

I also really appreciate the support of many boyfriends who read through my entire collection of crazy and still chose to continue dating. I'm not sure if you felt bad for me or found me charming. Regardless, thanks for the encouragement.

 

I'm going to change things up a little bit. As you may have guessed, from some of my posts, I have aspirations of writing a book. (Or two, three, or four… We'll see.) Anyway, all of my stories, up to 3/6/17, are true and happened to me. I'm thinking about adding some characters to my stories and playing around with fiction writing. You'll be able to tell the real stories from fiction. I think. ;-)

 

I'm not sure what my books are going to be like, yet. I've always enjoyed reading fiction but, maybe non-fiction is the right path for me. I'm pretty confident with the voice I've developed in telling my silly stories and would like to continue to write in that tone. I know I'm going to start off slow because, as you know, self-discipline has never been one of my stronger qualities. I may try to play around with other subjects, too. Stay tuned.

 

This site is meant to make you laugh through stories that you may be able to relate to whether it's sour love, a cooking disaster, a social faux-pas, etc. So, bear with me as I stumble through my experiences, hopefully, more gracefully than the actual event, but just as funny, and either share the lesson or just make you laugh out loud.

If there's ever a story that really hits your funny bone or makes your day, let me know. I'd love to hear from you.

So, sit back, put on your reading glasses and enjoy.

Please, take a minute to sign my guest book. It seems I have readers from around the world. I'd be more than happy to put you on an update list so you'll know when I have a new post. Cheers!

  

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Tuesday, June 9, 2020

Libretto

This is my first fiction post. I'm taking a few writing classes through Gotham Writers Workshop (www.writingclasses.com) (GREAT classes and instructors, btw.) Anyway, the assignment was to pick a character, setting, and situation from a given list and write a 500 word max story. I chose to write about an opera singer at a mountain resort, the situation is stolen chickens. Let me know what you think. :)

 

Elaine Dunn looked out at the crowd from behind the curtain. It was amateur night at the club, most of the acts were comedy but she had been practicing her opera. Her husband had discouraged her, he just doesn’t understand, she thought. Ever since she had her fall at the library, opera was the only passion that made her heart sing. He always complained that she never even listened to opera before the accident. She didn’t care, she felt in her gut it was a gift from God. Who would have thought that a spilled soda, on a marble floor, in the middle of the afternoon, would be a divine intervention? Certainly not her.

She had grown up on a farm in the middle of Iowa, surrounded by rows of corn. Now, look at me, she thought. I knew I was meant for greatness. She was one of the acts at the Pokolodi Lodge. Her husband noted that the lodge only had two and a half stars. Big deal, she thought, I am in Aspen, Colorado, the travel destination of the rich and famous. She was on her way.

She was act number three in the lineup. She knew it was just a matter of time before she had her own show, she had to do her due diligence. To calm her nerves, she started to massage her cheeks, then her throat, she moved her jaw from side to side just like she saw in a YouTube video. A young man holding a clipboard noticed her and asked, “Are you okay?”

“Oh. Yes. I’m warming up for my act. I’m next.”

“Phew. Things have been a little weird today. Our emotional support chickens, Kim and Kanye, have gone missing. We all suspect fowl play.” He said with a smirk.

She gave him a tight smile then resumed her focus. She let her tongue hang to her chin and shook her head aggressively. She moved on to lip trills.

When he got the signal, the man turned to her and said, “Hey, lady. You’re up!”

Elaine stepped to the center of the stage and said, “Good evening. I will be singing Non Più Mesta from La Cenerentola.”

The lights dimmed. She took a deep breath in and nodded to the MC signaling him to start her music. As she began, a table crashed in the audience. She continued to sing. The audience started to murmur. A man appeared to be chasing something in the darkened room. The audience shifted from left, then to the right. The man bumped over more tables in his chase. Elaine continued to sing nearing her crescendo. The man dove to the floor as the audience collectively gasped. As he stood, he held two chickens, one in each hand. Wide-eyed, the audience cheered in applause just as Elaine was finishing her song. She beamed and gave a dramatic bow then a curtsy for her audience and walked off the stage blowing kisses. I made it, she thought.


 

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